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10 Things You Do Differently When You Have A Second Child

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Second Child pinterest

I don’t have to tell you that when you have a baby, your life changes completely!  Suddenly everything around you fades away and you are completely focused on that little person that you’ve just brought into the world.  You worry about every little thing, especially since you probably have no idea what you’re doing!  When my daughter was sleeping too quietly, I’d check to see if she was breathing and when she screamed in the middle of the night, I wondered why she wasn’t sleeping.  Was she eating enough?  Why would she eat for the “food therapist (yes, there is such a thing) and not for us?  Should I take her to the doctor with a temperature of 99.7?  Worry, worry, worry!

Whew…so glad that’s over!  Not that I don’t ever worry anymore but now that I have two kids, it’s completely different!  By the second child you sort of know what you’re doing (MAYBE), and begin to chill a little.  Here are some of the ways my parenting style changed when the second one came along…

1. Birthing classes? HA!

When I found out I was pregnant after all the years of trying, I was so excited that I signed up for birthing classes, infant CPR classes and took a tour of the hospital before I even had my baby bump!  When I found out I was pregnant with baby #2, I just stopped drinking wine!

 

2. Get me out of this hospital!

After my oldest was born, I was way too scared to go home!  How in the world was I going to figure out what to do???  I had no idea what to do with this tiny human thing!  After my second child, I was begging to be released as soon as they wheeled me back in the recovery room.  Now I had this mommy thing down and I did not want to spend two days eating hospital food and sleeping in a tiny bed.  My husband actually had to tell me to quit harassing the nurses to let me leave early (but it worked…they probably couldn’t wait to get rid of me).

Baby book edit

3. Baby book? What baby book?

I now regret all the hours that I spent on my first child’s baby book!  You know the one I mean…you fill out pages and pages of information about important topics as the popular song of the day and the cost of a gallon of gasoline.  I did go so far as to buy one of these books for my youngest.  I think I may have even filled out part of the first page!  I figured if she really cares how much gas was when she was born, she can just google it!

4.  Please don’t start crawling just yet!

Isn’t it so incredibly exciting when your first baby finally starts to crawl, then takes his or her first steps!!!  Yay, we thought it was the greatest thing ever!!!  Oh wait…now we have to keep track of this kid!  We were in no hurry for our second one to do that.  It’s so much easier when they just stay in one place!

5.  I’ll miss you… but I’m outta here!!!

When my oldest was 10 months old, we went with some friends to the Dominican Republic for my birthday celebration.  I was so excited to go and couldn’t wait to relax on the beach with a nice cerveza!  On the ride to the resort, my husband bet me $1 that I would cry sometime that day because I’d be missing the baby. Are you crazy?  We were only gone for a long weekend…no way was that happening!!!  I’d been looking forward to some “me” time for a long time…hmmm, probably about 10 months now!  Anyway, I totally lost that $1 because when I called Grandma to check on the baby, the tears started flowing.

Fast forward to our first vacation after the second child.  Remember that commercial where the parents pull up to Grandma and Grandpa’s house, practically throw the kids at them and then speed off?  Yup, that was us!  My husband didn’t even bother to make the $1 bet again because even he knew he’d lose this time!  Yes, of course I missed the girls…but sitting on the beach relaxing with a nice adult cocktail certainly helps ease the pain!

6.  You’re fine!

I wasn’t as bad as some parents but I did probably make too much of a big deal when my oldest daughter sustained minor injuries.  Yes, if she was gushing blood, she certainly needed my attention.  However, sometimes I jumped in too quickly when she took a little spill and when children see you worry, they worry too.  Now when my youngest fall down (or runs into a door because she’s just like mommy), I ignore her and wait to see what she does first.  Sometimes even if she does cry, all I have to say “You’re fine” and she actually believes me!  Most of the time she just jumps right up and yells “I’m okay!” before I even do anything.

7. Maybe you DON’T need a doctor visit

A temperature of 99.9 requires a doctor’s visit with your oldest child!  The youngest just gets some children’s Tylenol and a cartoon!

Sponge Bob edit

8. Maybe not ALL the cartoons have to be educational

My oldest only watched Sponge Bob when daddy was home because I only let her watch “educational” show like Super Why and Team Umizoomi.  I’ve finally realized that it’s not the end of the world if my girls want to watch a little Tom & Jerry or even…gasp…Sponge Bob.  The funny thing is that now that they’re actually allowed to watch it, they both have zero interest in Sponge Bob!

9.  Sure, wear what you want

I was so excited to have a baby girl that for years my oldest had to be dressed to the nines, even for a trip to Publix.  While I still like to dress them up (it’s even more fun with two girls), I actually let my three year old pick out her own outfits when she wants to.  Sometimes they even match!  That’s when she wears actual clothes…last week she wore her Cinderella dress to Bed, Bath and Beyond.  I guess a princess doesn’t mind being a little overdressed!

10.  Time for your weekly bath

I remember my friend being surprised when she found out that I gave my oldest a bath every night (she already had two kids).  I was surprised at her surprise…didn’t everybody do that?  Fast forward a couple years and now I get it!  As long as they don’t look like Pig Pen from Charlie Brown, they’ll be fine for one more day!

If you just have one child right now, you probably think I’m a terrible parent!  If you already have two, you’re probably drinking a glass of wine right now and trying to count how many days it’s been since bath day.  It’s okay, they can bathe tomorrow!

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photo credit: Sponge bob via photopin (license)
photo credit: Baby’s Story 04962.jpg via photopin (license)

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Great list! Yea, as first time moms we definitely try to do it all, and there’s a lot I can see myself doing differently next time around. I never did the baby book though. I have one, and I add the keepsakes like his doctor’s visits stickers with his height and weight but I haven’t put anything else in there heh.

    Reply

    • Way to think ahead! I usually learn not to do things AFTER I’ve already done them…LOL!
      Thanks so much for stopping by!
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  2. Great post! That’s one reason I skipped the baby book with our little one. I knew if I have a hard time keeping up with it with one little one, I’d have an even harder time with 2! I also only do a bath every 3 days. I know other parents who have a baby the same age as mine that do a bath every day, but when I read in Parents magazine that it’s actually better for their skin not to bathe everyday, I jumped at the chance for a break from the daily bath! 🙂

    Reply

    • Yay! So I’m actually doing my kids a favor…of course I knew that all along LOL (okay, I didn’t but I’ll pretend that I did)! Thanks so much for stopping by!
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  3. This is so true! The one thing my son taught me is that the best laid plans oft go astray. I’m a planner. I plan EVERYTHING and when I don’t my anxiety level goes through the roof…and then I had the baby. He has taught me that it’s nice to plan, but HE will also set his own plans, and my plans mean nothing to him.

    Reply

    • You are absolutely right…they don’t care when we want to eat, shower or go to the bathroom…LOL. Planning all goes out the window! Thank goodness they’re so cute!
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  5. I remember saying and thinking these. And when #3 came along, well we often let #1 take over. She had it down pat. This brought back memories of the good old baby days.

    Reply

    • That’s so funny because we often refer to our oldest as “Mommy #2” (and she loves it)! I’m glad you enjoyed it!
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  6. Hahhaaa! guilty! Especially on #3, #4, #5, #6. 🙂 On hospital – I actually prefer not to come out so early because the care and the service we got here was so good, it was harder to leave than to stay! It’s almost like staying in a hotel! 😀

    Reply

    • You’re lucky that your hospital was so great! The only plus for mine was that the food was so bad, it was easy to immediately start dieting the baby weight away 🙂
      Thanks so much for visiting!
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

      • Hahaa! We had pretty good food too. Or we have visitors bringing us food all the time. Sorry..didn’t mean to rub it in your face. :p It’s a crazy word here..then reality hits when you get home with #2!

        Reply

        • You’re so lucky! I’m assuming that you’re in the UK (couldn’t find it on your blog but maybe I didn’t look in the right place). I have a lot of relatives in Scotland and have heard how well they take care of new moms 🙂

          Reply

  8. Oh yeah! So totally right. my first kid didn’t have processed sugar until she was a year old. I can’t promise that number 4 didn’t have a meal of cookies at some point! Hey, they have eggs! hahaha. but seriously, we often way over think the first kid b/c we are so fearful we will do something wrong, but by the time subsequent kids arrive, we realize that while we do try our best, they will also learn valuable lessons from our mistakes (as will we!) the relaxed parenting just reveals the embracing of our role as mom. thanks for the laugh! 🙂

    Reply

    • I’m so glad you liked it…and a meal of cookies never hurt anyone! In fact, a meal of cookies and wine would just about hit the spot right now! I totally agree that we learn from our mistakes and I think our kids are happier when we just relax a little (at least mine are) 🙂
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  9. Haha! I love this list. I was definitely more relaxed with my second. I don’t even know how many time I said “she’s fine”. I did so many things with my son but in the end he walked when he was ready and he talked when he was ready so instead I decided to just cherish the time together with my second. Thanks for sharing. #ConfessionsLinkUp

    Reply

  12. I know that is right. Now when I had my second child I did go to the birthing classes, because I wanted to know if there were new techniques and because I wanted my husband to be in the delivery room with me.

    Reply

    • I never did any of the techniques that I learned the first time so I figured I’d be just as bad a student the second time around…LOL
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  15. OMG! I can relate to so many of these and my first born is only 6 months old. We were so scared to leave the hospital and come home with her because, I mean, what the hell was I going to do at home with her? lol

    Great list!

    Reply

    • LOL…I’m with you! The first day we brought my oldest home, she was screaming in pain with gas and I had no idea what to do. I was so upset that my poor husband had to deal with two crying babies…a little one and a big one! With the second one, I was ready to leave as soon as she popped out! Thanks so much for stopping by!
      xoxo
      Lisa

      Reply

  16. This is hilarious! Mostly because it’s all true. Now, I’m a grandmother but what you’ve written here could have been written 30 years ago when I had kids!! Seriously. Saw this on Twitter and loved it.

    Reply

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